The TL;DR, Strengthening Your Next Social Gaffe


A bi-weekly roundup of putting your strong foot into your mouth
June 28 - July 11

Misplaced Strength

Whenever you do any kind of personality test with a team - CliftonStrengths, DiSC, Enneagram, etc.- you suddenly "know" your colleagues in a new way. That knowledge is powerful and you can't put the genie back in the bottle.

Armed with that data, it's hard to not adapt and change your behavior, whether you mean to or not. While personality inventories can foster understanding and better collaboration, it also opens the door for misunderstanding.

This could be good. This could be bad.

We're going to talk about the bad.


I've taken the CliftonStrengths assessment so many times (six at last count) and the two strengths that always appear on my Top 5 is Learner and Achiever. Shocking, I know.

The Achiever strength means that I have a constant inner drive to work hard, be busy, and accomplish tasks. Checking things off my to-do list is my love language. The Learner strength means that I'm energized by acquiring new knowledge, I get sucked into a wide range of interests (let me tell you about ROCKS), and am motivated by the journey of learning itself, rather than seeking mastery.

However, now that you know that I'm an Achiever and Learner, you might typecast me. Here's three common ways that knowledge might bite you:

Stereotype Trap: A surface-level understanding leads you to simplify how strengths manifests..

  • "Oh, Dan's an Achiever, he'll love plowing through this long list of mundane tasks." Absolutely not: I would hate that. My Achiever talent isn't a blunt instrument; it needs a purpose. It wants to accomplish things that matter. When my Learner theme isn't engaged to understand the why and the how, those tasks feel like empty calories—checking a box without any real nourishment. That isn't achievement; it's drudgery.

Isolation Trap: Focusing on a single strength ignores the symphony of how they work together.

  • "Dan, you're an Achiever so go complete this list of tasks for us, off you go." This treats my Achiever talent as if it operates as a soloist. In truth, it works in concert with my other dominant themes. My Learner theme needs to understand the context and the 'why' behind the tasks, and my Strategic theme needs to see how this work fits into the bigger picture. Without that fuel, my Achiever engine stalls. Give me the context, and I'll find the most effective way to accomplish the goal. Give me a blind list, and you'll get reluctant compliance at best.

The "They've Got This" Assumption: Labeling someone as "strong" in something leads you to assume their talent requires no support or recognition.

  • "Dan is an Achiever, so he's pretty self-motivated. He won't need much oversight or encouragement." This assumes my Achiever drive is a robot that runs on autopilot. My strength thrives on seeing the results of my effort and having that effort acknowledged. When accomplishment happens in a void—without accountability, recognition, or connection to a team's success—my motivation craters. I will inevitably redirect that energy toward goals where the achievement is actually seen and valued.

The goal of these personality tests isn't to slap a label on someone (or yourself). These tools help you gain a more nuanced language to discuss what energizes us, what upsets us, how we work at our best, and how to navigate change.

A tool like CliftonStrengths gives you so many possible ways to start a conversation. Get curious. Use a personality type as the starting point for a conversation, not the end of one.

Here's a conversation opener: "I see you're high in [Strength]. What does that actually look like for you? When does it feel like a superpower, and when does it get you into trouble?"

Learn to Scale, here to help you break the ice for your next date.


A TL;DR from the CRO

You would think that having the Activator strength would mean that I'm always ready to go on a walk, but actually, it shows up when I see bunnies.

-Roman Noodles, Chief Ruff Officer



The Summer of Strengths Continues!

Typecasting someone using a surface-level understanding of their strengths is a pathway paved with misunderstanding. However, as my favorite gameshow Gamechanger says, "The only way to learn is by playing, the only way to win is by learning, and the only way to begin is by beginning."

You're bound to screw up understanding someone's motivations and preferences, but you won't learn them without trying.

Begin learning about CliftonStrengths with this lovely tableau of all 34 strengths, each with a pithy quote and image.


Today's TL;DR was inspired by an IRL coffee date with Rachel Kohn.

Besides the "What if you screw up interpreting someone's strength?" topic, one of the other items from our chat that has been living rent-free in my head: when you are deeply enmeshed in helping an organization change and evolve, what do you learn about yourself through that process?

I know that regular reflection helps identify those insights, but it's kinda hard when you're the questioner and the answerer.

My recent strategy has been to set up coffee dates, reconnect calls with old colleagues, and selectively responding to cold outreach (I get 20-50 cold/spam emails a day). I then just spill the tea on what's going on in my head and see how people respond.

It's a weirdly freeing feeling, to share without a clear goal or outcome in my mind. There's nobody to impress; my shit is definitely not together. It's just my flaws, anxieties, hopes, and dreams.

Very Anti-Achiever.

I've been calling this my "Question Asking" phase, in contrast with my "Answer Seeking" default mindset.

If you ever want to get deluged in musings, slide into my calendar here.

Your neighborhood Learner,

Dan from Learn to Scale


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PS. The White Power Ranger Says His Name Out Loud For the 1st Time

Dan Newman

Entrepreneur, Professional Learner, & Proud Failure. Writes about sales, marketing, and entrepreneurship from the eyes of a learning and development nerd. Lead teams, manage people, scale a business, and learn better through the biweekly irreverent newsletter, the TL;DR.

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